Ring Thing
We here at Cheap and Tiny know that you like smart little tools. Heck, that’s probably why we still adore Gary Coleman. But now and then we understand the need to distance ourselves from technology, to take the time to enjoy the simpler, finer, non-battery-powered things in life. Like getting smashed, for instance.
Imagine this: You’re on a date, and she wants to chug down a 40. Bottle go all classic on you with the pop cap instead of a twist off? Don’t fret, nervous virgin! Comfort that classy lady and tell her that you’ve got your Ring Thing on and you’re on the case. With this nifty thingamabob you’ll never again find yourself high, dry, and buzzing for a cold one. It’s the perfect gift for that fratboy, 14-year old social deviant, or raging alcoholic in your life who has everything, including extensive liver damage. And best of all, it’s only ten bucks! Warning: trinket does not restore self-esteem, happiness, or eliminate Herpes.
[...] Finally, we have the Ring Thing ($7.99). Look familiar? The difference this time is it’s gold, which means that if you manage to field your beer-gutted, combover-sporting manager who just happens to be stuck in the gold lamé-d Seventies, you’ve already spotted yourself the perfect gift. It’ll not only give the impression that you’re kissing his dimpled buttcheeks, but it’ll hide the fact that you’re actually encouraging him to self-destruct in a shower of vomit and hops. But seriously, we don’t really ever dislike anyone that much, but it sure would be nice to give it a try anyway. Posted by riffraff | Link to this entry [...]